okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Randomize