Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
