I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
