brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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