Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
