I think i peed on brittanys purse
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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