You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
