someone get that fucking seahorse.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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