you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize