Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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