hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
