She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Couch. On fire.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
