love makes seman taste better
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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