so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
