i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
