Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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