There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
