how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
