my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
We need to get me chipped asap
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
