I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Alive.
So much puke
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
