i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
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