My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I forgot how hot balto sounded
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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