I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
