Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
