thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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