She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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