Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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