i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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