He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
