I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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