they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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