is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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