just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
