I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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