My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
