Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize
