I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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