I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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