it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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