Kiss
Puke
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I don't think brook has ever known best
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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