everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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