Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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