just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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