he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
