i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize
