I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
