erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
