i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
