i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize