I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize